


Not Again

by Jcat06172



Series: Zikaron (Memory) [2]
Category: NCIS
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-04-23 05:35:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14325729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jcat06172/pseuds/Jcat06172
Summary: Tony loses Ziva, but meets Tali for the first time. Thinks about killing himself very briefly. Still the same song.





	Not Again

**Author's Note:**

> Part two of the original fic. Written somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean. Same song, Caught By The Light by The Boxer Rebellion.

He was cursed.  
His first real love, shot dead  
In the head.

And his second,  
what he hoped would be  
His final.

Gone.

Dead or alive, he did not know.  
Safe or happy?  
Healthy?

Just an explosion. There was no body.  
Could she be…  
Alive?

He destroyed Trent Court anyways.  
He took Ziva away,  
He destroyed his life for a second time.

So Tony pumped his body full of bullets.  
That's what he deserved.

It felt just as good as it should have felt  
To do the same to Ari.

But Gibbs got there first.

Tony couldn’t take another loss.  
His heart was already broken beyond repair.

What was stopping him  
from putting a bullet in his own mouth?

Tali.

Ziva’s daughter.  
His daughter.

He had to protect her.  
Family first.

And he would search.  
He would scour the globe for her.  
He refused to believe she was dead.

Never again.  
He couldn't lose anyone else.  
He wouldn't lose Ziva.  
He refused.

Dead or alive,  
he would find her.

Because he loved her. 


End file.
